- Only 51% of us agree...
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People who own Shar-Pei puppies in eastern Wisconsin generally like the media's news coverage, but Pit Bull owners in Teaneck, New Jersey have stopped watching television altogether. I also found 78% of Catholics in Western New York mourned the passing of Burt Reynolds, while 20% of those surveyed preferred green chilies with their eggs in the morning.
34% of the people polled thought President Trump's hair looked odd, while another 36% objected to Hillary Clinton's Chinese jumpsuits. Remarkably, a whopping 60% didn't know who Trump and Clinton were and thought Ronald Reagan should whip incumbent Jimmy Carter in the Fall.
There has been an 8% rise in young voter registration for the election this year, 12% of which speak Ebonics, 23% speak Spanish, and 65% were incapable of comprehending the English language. There has also been a 15% rise in voter registration around Chicago cemeteries.
36% of the readership thought the Washington Post was excellent for wrapping fish, but 25% preferred the New York Times for lining bird cages.
Perhaps the most interesting fact is that only 6% trust the media, including the polls. A whopping 27% think the publications and polls are run by uninformed nincompoops, and 58% believe they are run by Socialists with a political agenda.
The rest are undecided.
First published: July 21, 2008 (revisions included)
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