- Try it. You might even enjoy the reaction you receive.
In my travels around town, I've noticed a lot of sour expressions on people's faces. Maybe it's just the snowbirds from up north. There just seems to be a lot of unhappy people walking around these days wearing a sourpuss. In a local restaurant I frequent for lunch, people come in with blank looks on their faces, and exit with the same expression. One would think consuming a good meal would change a person's disposition, but not so from what I have observed. Then again, maybe it was the meat loaf or stuffed peppers affecting them. More likely, I suspect it is based on our technology addiction or the state of our country that is altering our interpersonal skills.
Whether I am at the post office or a restaurant, it is not unusual for me to greet a stranger and wish them a good day. The reaction by most people though is one of bewilderment or intimidation. Instead of exchanging pleasantries, they look at me like I have three eyes. I can almost hear them saying to themselves, "What did he mean by that?" or "What does he want?" Frankly, nothing. I just want to say hello.
I learned this years ago when I was a young man sitting in the waiting room of my doctor's office. When I entered, the room was already full of patients representing a variety of ages. There were old magazines to read, and a trashy soap opera on TV which nobody was watching, yet nobody had the courage to change the channel. It was all rather gloomy. Then, all of a sudden, the front door swung open and the mailman walked in briskly, "Good morning everybody! Beautiful day out there, isn't it?"
He delivered the mail, turned and exited. After the door shut behind him, people seemed to snap out of their sullen trance, smiled, and began to talk with each other. I was taken by how such a simple gesture quickly produced a positive reaction, and have not forgotten the incident. Consequently, this is why I try to warmly welcome some one to our office, be it a delivery man, a customer, or whomever. In turn, people appreciate the attention and respond in kind.
A couple of weeks ago I happened to visit the local WalMart to pick up a prescription. Yes, the Walmartions were out in force that day, but I tried not to let them get me down. On this particular afternoon, as I exited, I saw a young WalMart employee sitting in the smoking area enjoying a small cigar. I judged him to be 18-19 years old. As a fellow cigar smoker, I approached him and kiddingly asked, "Is this the first class smoking section?" The young man looked up puzzled; my question had obviously caught him off guard.
I then asked him, "What kind of cigar are you smoking?" and he began to loosen up. It was a cheap cigar, something he could smoke quickly while on break. This led to a brief discussion on types of cigars and I confided in him my experience smoking my first cigar, a White Owl classic, which I smoked as a teenager behind my friend's house in Chicago. He laughed and asked me what I smoked now. I then offered him a cigar which he gladly accepted. The whole exchange between the two of us lasted no more than three minutes. Whereas he seemed sullen when I first met him, his spirits were obviously higher as we departed. We never knew each other's names.
I find it interesting how people tend to shun such repartee and build a force field around themselves. Perhaps worse is the reaction people have when someone greets them, probably because we are suspicious of their motives and do not trust them. Maybe so, but what is the harm of once and awhile saying, "Good morning everybody! Beautiful day out there, isn't it?" Try it, You might be pleasantly surprised by the reaction you receive.
Maybe there wouldn't be as many public shootings if we just learned to say "Hello" now and then.
Keep the Faith!
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Tim Bryce is a writer and the Managing Director of M&JB Investment Company (M&JB) of Palm Harbor, Florida and has over 30 years of experience in the management consulting field. He can be reached at timb001@phmainstreet.com
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Copyright © 2014 by Tim Bryce. All rights reserved.
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LAST TIME: TIM BRYCE: RABBLE-ROUSER?
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For as long as I can remember in my professional career, I have been accused of being a rabble-rouser by one person or another. When consulting on systems or management, people would be insulted when our company told them the truth. They had trouble accepting it. To illustrate, many years ago in Milwaukee, we were hired to determine the systems problems plaguing an insurance company. After studing the problem carefully we reported to the company's executive board they were rewarding their "fire fighters" for coming in at all hours to correct defects in their systems and programs; however, we went on to point out their fire fighters were also their chief arsonists, meaning there wouldn't be any problems if their leaders were doing their jobs properly. This didn't sit well with the executives and we were never asked to return. Nonetheless, our conscious was clear in terms of what we told them, the truth.
Customer Service is the front line of a business. It answers customer questions, schedules appointments, troubleshoots problems and acts as the customer's ombudsman. Although some people consider it an inconsequential function, I consider it vital to the success of a business.
Whenever the subject of political financing comes up, two names inevitably come to mind, the Koch Brothers and George Soros, both of whom are on the opposite ends of the political spectrum. The Koch Brothers support conservative causes thereby earning them the ire of the left. Conversely, Soros supports the liberal agenda and attracts criticism from the right. Both are iconic in terms of their contributions, causing them to be accused of trying to buy the country. True, they both have deep pockets, but let's consider the amount of money each side has truly invested.
Today's style of humor can probably best be described as "In your face," meaning it leaves nothing to the imagination. It's very graphic. Back when radio was the primary entertainment vehicle, comics had to be more precise in their language in order to paint a picture for their audience. Comedians such as 
The "Age of Enlightenment" was a period beginning in the 17th century where people began to question the status quo through discussion and reason. This led to many scientific discoveries and fueled the arts simply because people were encouraged to challenge the status quo and exchange ideas. Such discourse was made possible through free speech and the proliferation of the printing press thereby providing a convenient means to record ideas and convey information. Freemasons also had a role to play in this, although historians might argue otherwise, by providing a venue for the thinkers of the day to meet and talk. Some of the principals of this movement included Voltaire, Montesquieu, Franklin, Jenner, Mesmer, Mozart, Haydn, and Frederick the Great, all of which were Freemasons in search of knowledge. Many others followed and by doing so the arts and sciences were revolutionized, new trade routes were explored, new countries were colonized and founded, commerce and agriculture flourished, and political reforms enacted. It was an inspiring period.
Americans tend to be more reactive as opposed to proactive in their approach to life. I suspect the reason can be traced back to our Anglo heritage which historically has been hesitant to take decisive action. Consider how slow the British were to suppress the uprisings of its colonies, usually making the wrong decisions in the end. Our history is littered with instances affirming our reactive behavior; e.g., Pearl Harbor, the Battle of the Bulge, the Stock Market crash of 1929, 9/11, Hurricane Katrina, and the Crash of 2008. These disasters could have been avoided if we had heeded warnings and planned accordingly. For example, the destruction of Katrina could have been averted had local politicians heeded the advice of the Corps of Engineers. Pearl Harbor could have been avoided if the military had listened to General Billy Mitchell a whopping 17 years earlier.
My grandmother used to be fond of saying, "Most children are raised by amateurs, not professionals," and I think she really hit the nail on the head with this one. Regardless of how much you read or the classes you attend, nothing really prepares you properly for parenthood. Only by experiencing it and looking back afterwards do you appreciate what is needed to be an effective mother and father, but then again, it's too late.
The legalization of medicinal marijuana is being considered here in Florida. Other states have implemented it already, most notably Colorado. I have been polling various medical people about it. My dentist and dental hygienist sees nothing wrong with it, but my doctor friends are balking at adopting it, primarily because they know if it is legalized, they will be inundated with patients requesting it. Medicinal marijuana has also been approved in other countries, but it is far from being an international standard.
Ever since my youth, I have had many Italian friends. Inevitably, I have been invited over to their houses for dinner which is usually a gourmet feast of homemade pasta, meat, cheeses, wine, and other delicacies, usually prepared by "Moma" or my friend's wife. As I discovered, everything focuses on the red sauce, of which considerable pride and love goes into it. Interestingly, I've discovered all Italians believe they make the best red sauce and, in a way, they all do. Their sauces are based on family recipes handed down over generations and, as such, are perfectly tailored to family tastes.
I've been a baseball fan since I was a little kid. I followed the Yankees of the early 1960's, The Big Red Machine of the 1970's, and now the Tampa Bay Rays. The habits of the players have always fascinated me. For example, the players for the Boston Red Sox all seem to have some sort of ritual they perform just before they get in the batter's box. David Ortiz ("Big Papi") spits into his batting gloves and claps his hands before grabbing the bat, and Dustin Pedroia clears his sinuses and carefully examines his bat. The Sox are not alone in this regard; you can find a variety of strange habits in a ballpark, all the way from the Majors to Little League. A lot revolves around spitting, grabbing the crotch, and language. Wade Boggs was notorious for his pre-game rituals and how he steadfastly resisted any attempt to alter his regiment.
Once a week, I sit down with a group of friends after work for a little get-together. The purpose is simple, to just talk. Eight people regularly attend, but there are a few others who drop by from time to time to listen in and add their two cents. We've been doing this for about five years now and find it more rewarding than any other meeting we attend. Actually, it's quite therapeutic and something I highly recommend.